Traditional Skills for The Next Generation

              As another group of young people are heading off into the workforce, there are a few traditional skills I’m afraid they’ve never acquired. These are skills that might seem archaic to young people who are quite adept at navigating a digital world. However, the types of tasks that are to follow are ones that are extraordinarily commonplace to the parents of these graduates and are likely to be needed long into the future.
              Unfortunately, I have come to understand young people’s attitudes towards these skills the hard way. So, for example, I once had an extended debate with a student as to whether there was ever a scenario in which one needed to supply their own phone number in a voicemail wherein they requested a return call. To this student, cell phones or caller ID were so ubiquitous that anyone who retrieved the voicemail would be able to see the numbers of the people who called the phone. Apparently, this student assumed that anyone who might work at doctor’s office or any company would naturally use their personal cell phone for all communications related to their work and
that the main number of these businesses was simply that of an employee who worked there. In my work, the majority of my calls are from parents who do almost always identify themselves in their message and leave me with their preferred method to return contact. However, I would estimate that more than 90% of the occasional voicemails I receive from students do neither of these things. They are usually something simply along the lines of “Hi, I have a question for you. Please give me a call back.”
             A parent once shared with me an anecdote that she had tasked her son with addressing a number of envelopes for an event she was having. The teenager in turned placed the stamp in the dead center of the envelopes and wrote the return and recipient addresses in incorrect places as well. At first, the parent thought this was the act of a careless young man until she realized he really didn’t know any better. I’ve also seen students who seem unaware of how to write a check or how to properly use a phone that is not cell phone (or what “dial 9 to get out” means). They prefer to text and don’t do a good job of monitoring their email and their business etiquette can be somewhat lacking in
situations like interviews or formal meals. In other words, there are some skills young graduates will be expected to know in the adult world, because adults use these skills, but the schools are not doing much to teach these skills and young people are too connected to the alternative digital versions of these skills to have ever needed to acquire them.
            If schools are teaching these things, it’s probably a quick lesson on one day, perhaps in elementary or middle school. If that lesson covers a skill the student doesn’t use again for a long time, it’s easy to forget. So, I think the onus of really teaching these types of    things ultimately falls on parents. Consider teaching your child how to do some things that are second nature to you that might not be to them. You never know when
they are going to need it.

Getting the Feel of College Campuses

Summer is upon us and many people have vacations planned. Maybe you’re lucky enough to have the opportunity to go somewhere unforgettable, like Paris. However, what would be the point in that? Surely you’ve seen pictures of the Eiffel Tower before, right? What else could you possibly gain from going all the way across the Atlantic Ocean. Well, probably a whole lot. Seeing the sights and sounds, eating at the cafes, being immersed in the French culture--that’s a very different experience than just looking at a picture of the Eiffel Tower. So it goes with touring college campuses.


Unfortunately, not touring campuses is one of the biggest mistakes I see families make as they make their decisions about college. They assume that because they’ve been to the city the college is in, or been to the college the day of a big football game, or your friend who
graduated last year goes there, or they looked at a brochure, that they know what the on-campus experience is all about. Those things can’t replicate what it feels like on a college campus on a day-to-day basis though any more than eating a baguette from your local grocery store while listening to Claude Debussy and looking at pictures of the Arc de Triomphe on your phone can replicate a trip to Paris.


My operative word here is vibe, or you might say feel. Being on a college campus, on a more or less regular day is going to present a vibe that students need to inhale before they make the biggest decision of their young lives. You have to be there in person.


Actually, what I get most from students is this; “I’m going to such and such university. Well, I’m going to tour it next weekend, but then I’m going to go there.” So, I think most students do take tours but really only after they’ve fully made the decision to go to a given school. Hey, I’ve bought a shirt before, taken it home, and then tried it on. The difference is that it’s a whole lot easier to return a shirt than it is to transfer colleges.


TAKE COLLEGE TOURS, and do it before senior year. I think sophomore and junior year might be the best years for this, but if you’re driving past a school that might be on the radar in the 6th grade that you’re not going to drive past frequently, take the exit and go see it. That’s not too early.


All colleges and universities offer tours. Usually, you can find this information on the school’s website. Tours conducted by a trained individual (often a student) are best, but if the availability of those don’t fit with your plans, spending 20 minutes walking around campus and eating a meal at the student union is better than nothing. Whatever the case, make the effort to give your student the feel and vibe of the college they want to attend before they make this massive decision. And have fun on your trip this summer. Bon voyage!

A Tough Schedule For Senior Year

As one school years begins to wind down, it is time to look ahead to the next. For some students, this means selecting classes for their last year of high school, and if that’s the case the strategy might be a little different than what was done during the other years.


This is especially true for students who intend to go to college. The appearance of a strong and rigorous senior schedule is extremely important and is something colleges look for. They want to see that a student is continuing their pursuit of knowledge and is continuing to challenge themselves. Many seniors will have met their most strenuous graduation requirements and might not be required to take courses in some core subject areas However, that doesn’t mean they should not. A college-bound senior would do well to take challenging classes in language arts, math, science, and social studies.


Here is the bigger secret; who cares how you do in the classes? Well, to a point. I tell my college-bound students that as long as meet the minimum GPA required to graduate I don’t have much interest in their GPA at graduation. I am most interested in the GPA they have at the end of their junior year because that is the one they will present to colleges on their applications in the fall of their senior year.


To put this point another way, a student applies to college before their senior grades have a chance to take hold. What this means is that the courses listed on a senior schedule are magnified. The colleges are going to be forced to recognize the strength of your senior schedule before they might have the opportunity to see a result. This means a senior can and should be less conservative in the courses they select their senior year. They can take a class that might be a slight a reach for them because that is going to look good to the colleges and if they don’t do as well as they would like, the consequences are not as severe.


Now, the disclaimer paragraph. Colleges can do send what is a called a letter of rescission. This is when you get accepted, the college gets a final transcript which is terrible, and they send a letter rescinding your acceptance. Some times, this can even come after you’ve spent a semester at a college. Letters of rescission are an awful thing to receive. In my point above, I think seniors can afford to do a little worse than they are used to. They can’t afford to bottom out and I’m not suggesting it’s okay for a student to fail or make Ds in their classes. I just mean you don’t have to necessarily maintain your GPA exactly where it is through senior year. Students can take in a larger mouthful than what they are used to it, but they should not bite off more than they can chew. Senioritis is also a real thing too, so my greater point above is working with the assumption that a senior is a good student and has the will to continue to try to be that for the duration of their senior year.

SAT and ACT Test Prep

One of the most common questions I am asked as a school counselor is, “what can I do to prepare for the SAT and ACT?” The answer is, there’s a lot. A ton of exam prep materials exist that can help students squeeze a few more points out of these important assessments.

However, to begin this conversation it’s important to temper expectations. The purpose of the SAT and ACT is to compare the aptitude of students who are applying to college from a national and sometimes international pool. These tests separate the elite from the average in an unbiased way that a GPA might struggle to do. And, the tests do a pretty good job of this. In a sense, they represent your body of intellectual work for the entirety of your schooling so a little time spent preparing for these tests is only going to elevate a student so much. Test prep can improve scores but no one should expect that can turn an average score into a perfect one.

So, how does a student prepare for a test? My belief is that it is possible to overdo it. I wouldn’t want a student to ignore their classroom studies for the sake of preparing for an exam. Plus, it just seems like a good way to burn a young person out. However, some dedicated time spent preparing for an exam in the six to eight weeks leading up to the administration can be beneficial.

The College Board has partnered with the Khan Academy for their test prep and the ACT has partnered with Kaplan for theirs. I think these are the best places to start. It makes sense to me that the people who publish the exams are going to have the best insight into how to prepare, so I think any test prep should include these services at least in part. Both services allow a user to look at previous test attempts, explore weaknesses, and target those weaknesses within the test prep. This is an extremely valuable tool and one that any student will be wise to take advantage of.

These are not the only means for SAT or ACT test prep though. A multitude of third-party resources exists that are aimed at SAT or ACT preparation. They can carry different approaches or different methods of delivery and I won’t suggest that any one of them is better than the other here. You can find these at places like Amazon.com or in the big box book stores like Barnes and Nobles, so it’s probably a good idea to do a little shopping and find one that looks like it’s a good fit for you.

Those products will often be self-directed which means they’ll require a level of self-discipline that not every high school student has. In that case, many high schools offer some after-school or weekend workshops in the days or weeks leading up to test. Colleges and private tutoring services sometimes also offer test preparation classes. These can be the most expensive options for test preps but they occasionally come with money back guarantees to improve your score a certain number of points. I have had good feedback from these sorts of classes in the past and I imagine they wouldn’t offer the guarantee if they weren’t confident they could meet it more often than not.

Athletic Scholarships in College

For many students, athletic activities rival the work done in the classroom. Flexible educational opportunities such as virtual schooling exists now that allow students more time to focus on their training. Many students see their athletic ability as a way to potentially pay for college and therefore the time and costs associated with a sport can be considered an investment with the return being reduced tuition bills. While this is true, it’s important to note these scholarships are very competitive and limited. There are also some important differences in the different tiers of college athletics. Students and parents should be familiar with these as they make decisions about high school and their athletic opportunities.

Most people are familiar with Division 1 college athletics.
These are the schools that play college football on TV on Saturdays or
basketball in March. There are around 8 million students who play high school athletics
but only around 175,000 play Division 1 sports at any given time. So, these are
the most competitive scholarships. However, if you’re able to land one they can
be quite lucrative and cover tuition, housing, and meals. Nevertheless, if you
are talented enough to have the opportunity to play Division 1 sports, there is
still no guarantee you’ll receive scholarship money. This is particularly true
if you play a “non-revenue” sport which is often everything except football and
men’s basketball.

Division 2 schools give some athletic scholarships
as well. However, these schools are often smaller, and the demands of the
athletic program might be less intense than what is found at Division 1
schools. Student athletes might have more of an opportunity to be a bigger fish
in a smaller pond.

Division 3 schools do not offer athletic
scholarships. This is a very important line that is drawn at this tier and one
that many students and parents are unaware of it. Most Division 3 athletes will
qualify for some financial aid but that will be in the form of academic or
need-based scholarships. It won’t come from the athletic department. As a
result, the demands of the athletic programs might be less intense still than
Division 2 programs.

The same is true for colleges that compete in the
National Association of Intercollegiate Athletics or NAIA. These colleges are
generally on par with Division 3 schools and also do not offer athletic
scholarships. However, they will also give most of their athletes some
financial aid through other avenues.



Any high school athlete who aspires to play at the
next level should register with the NCAA Clearinghouse. There are strict
academic standards a student-athlete must meet in order to qualify for college
athletics. These qualifications vary by the tier of the athletic program but
registering with the NCAA can get your foot in the door for each division.
Students and parents should be aware of financial implications of being a
student athlete and how different colleges and individual sports at individual
schools treat financial aid. There is no one-size-fits-all answer for anything
related to college athletic scholarships so it’s crucial to ask lots of
questions to recruiters and do your own research.

The Scoop on Local Scholarships

Within any given community, there exists a number of civic organizations or groups. These groups often raise funds throughout the year for a variety reasons and one of those is often scholarships. These local scholarships can be quite lucrative, but they are not always the easiest to find. So, here is your guide to what can add up to a substantial amount of money.

        Indeed, not all these scholarships might seem like
a lot of money on their face. You might find some scholarships that reward as
little $100 which could seem like a drop in the bucket towards tuition and
other college costs. However, a resourceful student who can win a handful $100
scholarships might be able to make a meaningful impact on their college costs.

        So, where do you find these scholarships? Local
high schools, whether you attend there or not, or a good place to start. The
people who offer the scholarships are often volunteers so they might be looking
to get the word out as easily as they can. They also might have attended school
at a time when school choice was not as prominent as it is today, so they could
be unaware of all the avenues available as a high school. These people are
going to go the easy route as they distribute information about the
scholarships they offer and that means the local public high school.

        You can try to google these scholarships, but that
might lead to dead ends. The civic organizations might not have a web page to
begin with, and if they do it’s not likely to be a top result from Google’s
algorithm, unless you are searching for something very specific in which case
you probably already know what you need to know about the scholarship. Students
would be better served keeping tabs on local newspapers where information about
these and the fundraisers they are supported by are often published.

        Lastly, you can just ask around. If a student or
their parents have connections to civic groups, ask a member of the group
offers a scholarship. I suppose my point here is that students are going to
need in look in some places they are not used to or are not comfortable with to
find these scholarships. They are going to have to get off-line, read a
newspaper, and talk to real people on the phone or in person. That’s where
these types of scholarships are most likely to be found and there a lot of them.

        It is worth it though. While there are some small
scholarships out there, many of these organizations have well-oiled
fundraisers, endowments, and volumes of contributors that make for hefty
prizes. There are several organizations in my community that offer scholarships
in the thousands of dollars and some of those are renewable each year.
Unfortunately, these scholarships are not flush with applicants, so the
competition is slim. That’s a good thing for these students who choose to apply,
and it makes their effort in finding these all that much more worthwhile.

Mental Health Resources

Lately, it has been difficult to escape the impact of poor mental health on society. Too frequently, this issue has led to a violent attack on some unexpecting group. We can debate other issues related to these attacks, but it’s hard to argue that poor mental health isn’t a key component and underlying cause of the perpetrator’s desire to destroy the lives of others. After these attacks, there is often a public plea for more attention to mental health and counseling. I won’t disagree that more support here would be better, but I also believe there are many mental health resources already in place that are just underused. Perhaps, a key issue for that is a lack of awareness so the following is a guide to some of those resources.

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255. However, it seems like we actually talk on the phone less and less. Not to worry, their website has a chat feature. The major social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram have mechanisms in place as well to report suicidal threats. The first step in these is to “report the post”. While we might think these tools are there for content considered obscene or hateful in some way, answering a series questions within the reporting process can connect users with helpful links and contacts such as emergency services or preventative agencies.

Speaking of emergency services, those who work in these fields are trained to assist those experiencing a mental health emergency or have strong connections to those who do. The same is true for educators and those in the medical field. Who doesn’t know a police officer, EMT, firefighter, teacher, nurse, or doctor? These titles are ubiquitous and simply finding one of these individuals and expressing your concern is generally enough to get the ball rolling.

Of course for young people, mental health usually starts at the school. We often call counselors “school counselors” rather than “guidance counselors” because their role has grown more academic and less related to overall well being. However, that is still a critical component of what they do. Many schools have dedicated mental health counselors on staff and students are welcome to see them as needed. Schools are now also using technology to assist in the reporting of mental health concerns. Some schools have instituted “tip lines” or phone numbers one can anonymously text in order to report a concern. There are also apps that can do the same thing, such as Florida’s new Fortify Florida app.

There are many additional avenues through which one can find assistance for themselves or others who may require mental health support. However, none of these services or resources can do any good if they are not utilized or remain in the realm of the unknown. Mental health continues to be a concern in America especially for our young people and we are all responsible for guiding others to the help they might need.